Religious Intolerance is Ignorant

This blog is on a subject that has been on my mind for quite some time. As soon as I knew that Trey Parker and Matt Stone were in the works to bring about the “Book of Mormon” musical, I began to prepare myself for the influx of misinformation that would arise from the show. And I kept thinking to myself, “why does this keep happening?” Sometimes, it gets exhausting defending ones religion over and over and over again, and always on the same subjects. I understand that being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, or more commonly “Mormon,” is something that most people don’t understand. This is easy to see, seeing as how I know absolutely nothing about Jehovah’s Witnesses or the Amish. And I’m sure I have some misconceptions about their respective religions. What’s strange to me, however, is how ignorant people can seem to be when it comes to the religion of others. This is not going to be a post about how hard it is to be a Mormon, or a defense of being a member of the church. This is more so an observation about the lack of religious tolerance and understanding among some of the people who profess to be the most sincere and devout Christians.

Let me qualify myself briefly, so at least, for those who may not already know, a little of my background. Yes, I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I believe in the King James Version of the Bible. I also believe in The Book of Mormon to be another testament of Jesus Christ that goes hand in hand with the Bible. I have been a member my whole life. I was baptized into the church at the age of 8, by my own free will and my own choice. That was 18 years ago, as I am now 26. When I turned 19, I chose on my own to serve a two year mission for the church. Yes, I was one of those guys you see riding around on bicycles and going door to door dressed in white shirts and ties. I was called to serve in the beautiful country of Cambodia and arrived in May of 2004 and left in May of 2006. Cambodia is a country that is 95% Buddhist, a topic I will return to later. For two years, I left behind all my worldly possessions and desires and did nothing but serve. I studied the Bible and the Book of Mormon daily, as I was teaching others about Christianity. I have friends from many different faiths, Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran, Protestant, Jewish, Orthodox Jewish, Catholic, Roman Catholic, Buddhist, Muslim, Agnostic and even Atheist.

While yes, I have been thinking about this post for awhile now, I have not put down before me a list of scriptures or anything of that nature. Again, this is not going to be a post about being Mormon. This is a post about religious tolerance.

I don’t recall the first time I saw the bumper sticker that had the beautiful word “coexist” but it has stuck with me ever since. I am a Christian and I believe Christianity to be the one true religion, otherwise I wouldn’t be a member of it. But that does not make those around me any less of a person, especially in the eyes of God. To God, every soul is sacred. I believe that people should be free to believe how they want to believe. I am more than willing to sit down and discuss religion with others, as long as it is a conversation about learning and understanding and it doesn’t turn into a debate about who’s right, and who’s wrong. And unfortunately, it seems, that Christians tend to be the worst at religious tolerance. I cannot speak for each and every member of the Christian faith, but it is my philosophy that if you want others to believe what you believe, you must practice what you believe. God is the Judge of us all, I have absolutely no power, right or authority to pass judgment on any single person on this planet. But yet, the most sincere and devout Christians will be the first to tell others, including their fellow Christians, that what they believe is satanic, belongs to a cult, or is just flat out wrong. In the words of Christopher Titus, “If your religious beliefs keep you from stabbing me, I don’t care what the hell you believe in!” Why can’t more Christians who are taught to love all of God’s children be more tolerant of those around them? There are so many black eyes for the Christian faith, the crusades being the biggest. Yes, it is true that the Bible says “Every knee shall bow, and every tongue shall confess that Jesus is The Christ.” (forgive me if that’s not verbatim, and please forgive the lack of a reference, but those that know where it is, know) While that is true, it is not our place to force any religion on another.

God teaches us to love one another, to serve one another and to help one another. He does not teach us to bash on others religions, to force others into our religion or even be biased against those not of our faith. He teaches us to be understanding, not to be ignorant.

Some of you may be saying, “But that’s exactly what you did when you went to Cambodia.” Yes, I went around seeking to teach those about my faith. But what I did not do is force my religion on them. I never forced my way into any home, and most importantly, I NEVER put down or belittled their own religion. I’m not going to say I was perfect at it, or that I’m the perfect example, because I’m not. No one is perfect, the Bible tells us so. Cambodia is a country that is 95% Buddhist, and here I was, one of the “Jesus People” who walked around their country wanting to teach them about a God they did not understand. If you offended one of them, you offended all of them. And you’re not going to get very far by belittling those around you. There is a difference in proselyting and forcing.

I have been Christian my whole life, I have never been any other religion. I don’t understand most other religions, because I have not sat down and studied other religions. I have heard many things from others that tell me about some of what seem to be strange beliefs from other religions, but if I really wanted to know if what they said was true, I would not use Wikipedia, Google or anything else on the internet. I would find someone of that faith and I would have a conversation about understanding, not a conversation about who is right and who is wrong. After 9/11 it seemed that everyone in America though that every Muslim in the world was the most evil person ever! This is exactly what I’m talking about. That kind of religious intolerance is simply ignorant. But no matter what people said, the general consensus was that all Muslims wanted to do was to kill Americans.

I had the opportunity in college to study Arabic. In this class were many Americans whose parents had moved to the United States from Arabic speaking countries. The majority, if not all, of these students were Muslim. So I sat down with one and had a conversation of understanding. And obviously, not every Muslim wants to kill Americans, there are tons of Americans that are Muslims! So that wouldn’t make much sense now, would it.

I have rambled, but the point I really want to get across is that in this world, we must COEXIST! I don’t care what religion you are, if you are condemning someone else and belittling someone else, you’re not following your own creed. To say that someone else’s religion is a cult, is simply ignorant. Simply by definition EVERY RELIGION IS A CULT. Cult: a particular system of religious worship, especially with reference to its rites and ceremonies. (Dictionary.com). That is not an attack on any religion, it is a mere statement of fact. If you’re going to belittle someone else, make sure you know enough about what you are saying and that your facts are solid. Please, do not believe what someone tells you about someone else’s religion unless you have gone to the source. I’m not going to go to my History teacher to get help on my Physics homework, I’m going to ask my Physics professor.

I feel like I’m beginning to beat a dead horse. I love you all, be more understanding of those around you. Be more tolerant of someone else’s beliefs. Again, as Titus says, if what that person believes keeps them from stabbing you, then who really cares what they believe!

The Avenue

So... I know it's been forever and a day since I've written, I blame some of that on my lack of a computer for awhile. My other laptop finally crashed beyond repair. But today, I just couldn't resist the urge to write.

A lot has been going on. I've got a slightly different position at work, I solely do Inmate Transport across the state of Louisiana, mainly though I stay in southern Louisiana, you know, south of Alexandria typically. I'm getting married in a few more months, and the planning on that has been fun. While that has been a big event in my life, I'm saving more details on that for a later post. I wanna focus this one on some music...

It's rare that I find a song that I can put on repeat and keep listening to it over and over and over again, and yet as I'm typing, it's probably the 4th time in a row I've played this song... "the Avenue" by Cowboy Mouth is just amazing. I know this song came out a long time ago, it was written in Post-Katrina New Orleans by a band from New Orleans. But I just discovered this song today! Now in my defense, I was in Cambodia when Katrina happened, and then by the time I got back, other news had taken the front page. And I'm so completely drawn to this song, to this city... It's bizarre. Before I even met Sierra I had a class down here in New Orleans, and I fell in love with the city instantly. It was like the city was calling me and begging me to come and stay. I feel such a strong connection to this city, it blows my mind. Ever since the first night I stayed in New Orleans, it became home. I'm not from here, never had even visited the state until that class. So now, hearing this song, hearing someone else's love and pain for this city just pulls me to it even more. I love New Orleans, I don't know why, I don't know what it is about this city, but we connect somehow somewhere deep down inside.

New Orleans, I don't wanna live anywhere else but The Avenue.

Which cames first, the music or the misery? I think I know

One of my favorite movies and novels is High Fidelity starring John Cusack and written by Nick Hornby. In this story, the main character Rob Gordon asks towards the beginning, "Which came first, the music or the misery? Am I miserable because I listen to pop music, or do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable?" Well... I wondered this myself for many years, and you know what, I think I finally know.

When I was in high school, I couldn't get enough of a band called The Ataris. I would listen to them just about everyday. My favorite album by them then, and still now, is "Blue Skies, Broken Hearts Next 12 Exits." I used to listen to this album just about daily. With songs like "Your Boyfriend Sucks" and "San Dimas High School Football Rules" and "The Last Song I Will Ever Write About a Girl." These were all songs about heartbreak and wanting to get the girl that he couldn't get. Not really songs about misery... but songs about not necessarily being happy. At that point in time I felt I could relate, like these lyrics were written for me, and this guy knew what I was feeling. And I rocked it out man, you can ask my friends, I freakin LOVED that album and that band. And there were many other bands that I would listen to that had very similar songs, "Grand Theft Auto" by Fallout Boy, the first All American Rejects album, this is also when Dashboard Confessional wasn't mainstream yet, and his lyrics were so heartbroken and miserable, that I loved listening to him. I felt like we connected every time I would listen to their songs. To finish it off, bands Matchbook Romance and Taking Back Sunday (the "Tell All Your Friends" album.) All these albums were albums I couldn't get enough of. They all had songs about not having the girl, not being happy, wanting what they couldn't have, the girl leaving, songs like that. And I connected and listened to them all the time and absolutely LOVED it. Well a funny thing happened about two months ago...

I had made a playlist of these bands and albums a long time ago, and I still liked listening to them fairly often. But about two months ago, I put this playlist on, I figured I hadn't listened to it in awhile and I was feeling nostalgic, so I played it. Well, when it came on, I realized something. I didn't really enjoy this music as emotionally as I used to. Back then, I connected, I felt the same pain, shared the same desires and had the same misery that they did... but at that point, I realized I no longer connected with the music. I'm not saying I no longer like these bands, I'm just saying I no longer have that emotional connection anymore. And the emotional connection is the biggest reason I like certain songs and bands. Like you've seen with my Butch Walker posts, or other posts about other songs on here.

Two months ago, I realized that High School Josh no longer existed. Now I know that you can't live in your past your whole life, that's not what I'm referring to. But there's a little part of you that you take with you from every stage of your life that you've ever had. Like you always have some piece of your childhood with you, or some piece of the time you served your mission (ie. Me in Cambodia), you take with you your high school drama and crushes. These are things that tend to carry with you at all times. Well, as I listened, I realized that I had actually let this person go a long time ago. High School Josh has gone somewhere else. He's no longer with me. And it's funny because he took his musical taste with him.

These days, I realize I don't listen to that music much anymore at all. Perhaps my musical tastes have grown up as I've matured... maybe. Or maybe I just no longer wanted to listen to songs about misery or heartbreak. I was happy, and I want happy music to go with it.

I'm no recently engaged and haven't listened to songs about misery since about two months ago.

In a stretch of a realization... Some people may say they knew they were ready to get married for this reason, or for that reason, whatever they are supposed to say. The typical answers. Well, I knew I wanted to get married because my fiance is the best person in the world. She's done so much for me, and I've never wanted to lose that. No one person, other than my parents, have been as wonderful to me as she has been. She's sacrificed so much for me, and that's how she shows her love. And I've loved her for a long time now. And I knew that we were wanting to get married, we talked about it often. And this was a real thing. And I was always very confident with this decision and that I knew she would be the woman I wanted to marry. But that little part of me, that High School Josh knew that it wasn't possible until I grew out of some things. And High School Josh knew long before I did that she was the one. That's why he had left so long ago, only, he never told me that he was leaving. It took me some extra time to figure it out. And that day that I played that playlist, I knew that High School Josh was gone, and that now Just Josh was on his own. Just Josh was no ready to live the rest of his life and move into the most important part of his life... marriage.

Now, am I saying that music is what told me I was ready to get married. No, of course not. But it was at that point that I definitely realized I was not miserable/unhappy anymore. I had no reason to be unhappy, I had found the one, and I was happy.

So what came first, the music or the misery? Definitely the misery. Cause when you're happy, even when you don't realize just how happy you are, you don't care for the music about misery or heartbreak anymore. Thank you John Cusack and Nick Hornby. And RIP High School Josh.

Why Men Are Stupid

There comes a time in every mans life when he does something really stupid. Really, really, really stupid. A lot of times this stupid act is preceded by the phrase "hey man, watch this!" Then there are those other times when a man does something so stupid he jeopardizes everything he loves and everyone that he loves. And why does he do such a thing? This is the same question that many people ask, I've been asked it a few times, but I never had an answer. I don't really have an answer now, just some thoughts.
I wish I could explain why men do these things. I wish I had a fool proof scheme for every guy to follow that would allow them to never do anything stupid ever again. But yet, it continues to happen. It happens to the best of us, in ways you never thought it could happen. Sometimes it deals with thinking you're better or stronger than you really are, sometimes you think that it'll never happen to you. And then BOOM! You realize you're not as strong or as good as you thought. There comes a point in our lives when somehow we become the person or thing that we hate. How does that happen? I'm sure it's the same formula that makes guys do some really stupid things.
Now I'm not gonna sit here and say it's only the men that screw up and do something stupid. I know that women do it too. But for whatever reason, it seems that men do it a lot more than the women do. Why is that? What is it about men in our DNA that doesn't stop us from doing these stupid things? Is it in the DNA or what is it? And there's been a number of ways that men have said they were sorry... cards, roses, whatever the case may be. But what do the women do? That really has nothing to do with any of this, it was just a random thought I had.
And you know, there's just never enough ways to say you're sorry. Nothing you could ever do to make up for those stupid moments, lapses of judgment, or just plain idiocy. You could say you're sorry as many times as you have breaths, and it would never make up for what you have done, man or woman. We as humans think we are better than we really are, and then we fall, we get knocked down and we get ourselves knocked back to reality. You think you've got life figured out, and then you end up somehow kicking yourself in the nuts.
So here's to hoping that men and women can do their best to never do anything stupid ever again. Cause once you do, you'll spend the rest of your life making up for it.

Death is a Funny Thing

Death is a funny thing, and by funny I don't mean ha-ha funny. I mean that it has a funny affect on people. This weekend I came home for a funeral, and I believe I've learned a few things in the journey.

What exactly is death? Death is a separation, the end of the line, the loss of a loved one, a time to move on, a time for gathering, a time to laugh, and a time to cry. But most importantly, it's a time for honor, and for reflection. Because the scary truth of the matter is, we could all go at any moment. As was said today, we're all one person away from running a stop sign from death. It really could get anyone of us at any given moment. But when that moment comes, honor should be given. Now, that being said, I hope to outlive every single one of my friends/relatives and anyone else who would plan to come to my funeral. There should be no flowery ceremony or speeches given when I go. I only ask for a few things at my funeral; bagpipes will be played, my wife will be taken care of, and the whole ceremony is over in less than an hour, preferably thirty minutes. And that's it. Take the party elsewhere if you would like to continue socializing or to be seen. But back to death...

Death comes for some after a long, painful battle with some form of cancer, or a variety of other diseases. Those are the ones that die strong, that are tested until the end, and most die very honorably. I've yet to lose someone in my own family that I was close to, but I've watched as several others have dealt with the struggle with their own parents or other members of their family. It's something I've been blessed to avoid so far, but I know my time will come. And when it does, I only hope that I can be as honorable in surviving as they are in death.

I have a new favorite blog, and I've shared it with some of you, http://rulesformyunbornson.tumblr.com/ and oddly enough, the day that I attended the funeral of a very great man, this was the rule posted "Rule #448: Attend the funerals of great men." I thought to myself how fitting that really was. Those who die honorably deserve to be honored at their funeral. It's a difficult thing to be a great man everyday, and yet I can look at out some, especially the late Doug Beck, and they seem to do it with such ease. Being great has become second nature to them. To live honorably and to die honorably should be every mans goal in life. I only pray that I can accomplish that in my life.

The life of a legend

Most of you will not care one bit about what I'm about to write. Most of you probably won't even know who I'm writing about. But in recent news, Ken Griffey Jr. announced his retirement from the game of baseball. I don't think I've ever been as sad and disappointed at the announcement of an athlete retiring as I was when I heard the news.

As a child, I don't remember being that kid who had a ton of heroes, and I don't remember saying I wanted to ever be like anyone, except for Griffey. Here was a man that broke into the major leagues at the age of 19. And it looked like he was having fun no matter what he was doing. He played baseball and he was having fun. And to top it off, he was one of the best players ever to play. I wanted to be like Griffey. I had a Ken Griffey Jr. Louisville Slugger, I had a Ken Griffey Jr. baseball glove, I had his poster on my wall. He was my hero. His swing, possibly the sweetest swing in the history of baseball, was a thing of beauty. When he hit homeruns, he seemed to do so effortlessly. The game seemed to come naturally to him, and he was amazing. I have never looked up to one athlete nearly as much as I look up to him.

Now flash forward to now... He had been struggling a lot lately. He was in a career high 103 game homerless streak when he retired. But when he played, he was still having fun. He hit 630 career home runs over a span of 22 baseball seasons. Hitting less than 20 home runs only 7 times in his career. Earned 10 straight golden glove awards at centerfield and came up only 219 hits short of 3,000. He accomplished all these awards and many more during the steroid era of baseball. And throughout the entire investigation has gone on, his name has not been linked to steroid usage at all. In a time when records were being broken, and new baseball legends were taking the stage, it appears that all of the big names have been linked to the usage of steroids. All except "the kid", Ken Griffey Jr. As I have learned this, my respect for the man has only increased. I loved to watch him play, and I'm sad that it couldn't keep going. He was my childhood athletic hero. I've never seen someone enjoy what they do for a living nearly as much as he did.

George Kenneth Griffey, Jr. it was an honor to watch you play sir. And thank you for being a hero and staying true in a dark time in American Baseball. You will be missed, but forever loved and forever remembered.

What is love? (baby don't hurt me)

So I got to thinking today, and I'm not quite sure what brought it on. And for most of you, the idea of me thinking is prone to bring about trouble. But this time, I was thinking something a little more insightful. I guess this goes back a few weeks to when they asked Sierra and I to talk in Sacrament. Oddly enough, our topic was on eternal marriage. Well, Sierra spoke first, and she spoke long enough to leave me with only about 10 minutes. My talk was focused on what makes a successful eternal marriage, cause I guess I'm such an expert at it being that I'm still not married... Ha. Anyways, so I got to thinking that a good successful marriage is based out of doing the little things.

They say that love is never having to say you're sorry. I completely disagree with that! I think a better statement should be that love is knowing WHEN to say you're sorry. Just because you love somebody doesn't mean you aren't gonna say something stupid... eventually. Ha. (just ask Sierra) ;-) But I think when you love someone, you know when you need to suck up your pride and say you're sorry, and to ask for forgiveness for whatever it is you may have said or done.

But I think the biggest key to a successful marriage is to do the little things. The simple little things that don't seem to be that big of a deal, but have a very lasting impact. What are some examples you may ask? Well, let me embarrass Sierra for a little bit. As we all know... I like sports... and not only do I just like sports, but I love attending sports, watching sports, reading about sports, and watching sportscenter every night. And yes, I even enjoy fantasy football. Now, like most people Sierra could have scoffed at my love of sports, and even my dabbling into fantasy football, but she didn't do that. What she did was she got interested in it, because she knew that I enjoyed it. And not only did she get interested in it, but she even went online and created a t-shirt for me that had my fantasy football team logo on it. She then would ask weekly how my team was doing and if I was winning, and what my chances for the playoffs were. She would even watch the games with me! (of course it helped that my QB was Drew Brees who just happens to play for the New Orleans Saints, and that the Saints did exceptionally well this past year, and that I now live in Southern Louisiana) But she stepped up and she did this series of little things, why? Because she loves me.

So what is Love? Love is pretending to be excited about fantasy football. It's watching the football game, or whatever game it may be and learning enough about it to provide noteworthy criticism of the calls being made. Love is also watching Project Runway on thursday nights with your girlfriend and getting excited about it. Love is buying flowers for no reason, love is wearing pink to her sorority function (sorority colors are pink and green) Love is doing the little things, always doing the little things. Cause that's what love is about. Love is going that extra mile not because you have to, but because you want to. Because you want her to feel special. You want her to know that you think about her everyday and all you want to do is make her happy. And love is doing the little things in return, because love is unsuccessful if it only goes one direction. Love is a two way street, it needs both sides to work. That is what love is. And I'm not trying to say that I'm a master at it, because I still know I have a lot to learn, but I'd like to think that I'm getting there. In the words of Rob Gordon, "I think for the first time, I can see how it's done."

Emo like it's high school all over again

Dude... wtf is going on? What in the world am I doing sitting on my couch feeling all depressed and listening to some old school Dashboard for? I look at my life, and I can't really complain. I've got a great girlfriend as was mentioned in the last post, and she has a great family. They've taken me in and they've taken care of me since I've moved down here to Louisiana. So why can I not shake this funk and fell into the pit of high school emo Dashboard?

I think it has a lot to do with my struggle to find a job. Well, I have a job, but not a career job. I like the people I work with, but I'm not by any means planning to make a career out of it. This is mainly going to be me just complaining but that's just how I am right now. I struggle to be truly happy for my friends that have graduated and are already working full time in the field they want to be in, while I'm stuck working in the mall. Don't get me wrong, I've made more money this year already than I did all of last year... but that doesn't make up the fact that I'm a college graduate that's still only getting paid by the hour and not a salary position. Maybe I'm just wondering when is it my turn? Why can't all these supposed connections finally come through and produce a position? I mean, I dunno... I guess I just needed to complain, and this is my forum. I'm really not always this depressed, but I just tend to write more when I am. And of course, it never makes it easy when my dad is always asking if there's any news as to my employment situation. I feel like a failure every time he asks... I never know what to say, besides... "um... well, no Dad, nothing yet... still." I know the job market is not going to come to me, but how freakin far do I have to travel until we find each other?

Wherever you are job, just now that I'm tracking you down, and I will own you! I will conquer this and I will achieve greatness... but I guess I'm just supposed to go through a huge pile of the smelliest, dirtiest, nastiest and all out disgusting pile of... well... you get the point. Life overall is good. Just frustrated at this point. *sigh*

BTW, new Butch Walker album is amazing, get it.

It's Been Awhile...

You know how occasionally you'll hear a song on the radio/ipod/ZUNE that just sparks a memory or some type of inspiration? Well, I guess you could say something like that happened to me. Butch Walker has a new album out, called "I Liked It Better When You Had No Heart", and the last song on the album is called "Be Good Until Then". The song is written from a father to a child and gives him some advice on how to go about his life. Which got me thinking how I was doing.

About 4 months ago I made the choice to move down to Louisiana to be closer to Sierra. It was a bit of a risk, because I was moving my entire life down here for her. Now granted, moving to Louisiana does open me up to many more federal positions for here in the Gulf region. But that was only a side bonus. The biggest bonus and the whole reason for moving down here was for her. And so far, I like to think that it has worked out fairly well. I mean, she and I are still happy together, we've discovered that we can put up with each other on a daily basis and still be happy. So far it has proven to be a very beneficial move.

When she and I first started dating I knew she was special. I knew she had come in to my life for a major reason, which reason I did not fully understand at that point. At first, I thought maybe it was just for a much smaller reason. But now, after being down here for 4 months, I've begun to discover that the reason was so much more than what I first thought. It becomes clearer and clearer everyday what the plan is for us. And it's more and more exciting every day. It seems that moving down to Louisiana has been one of the best decisions I've ever made. Things haven't been moving as smoothly as one could hope with the job search, but it seems that at this point, that's not as important anymore. It's easy to say that at this point in my life, she has been the best thing to happen to me since my mission to Cambodia.

Who's got two thumbs and is the luckiest guy in the world?!?! THIS GUY!

Riding amongst the waves

After some encouragement from a friend of mine, I'm writing another blog. Last night, i read a lot of my old facebook notes, my myspace blogs, and even more embarrassing, my old xanga entries. I discovered something about myself. I discovered those that read what I wrote knew more about what was going through my mind then any of my friends or family. I discovered I'm one of those people who will listen to your problems and help you work through them, but for the most part keep my issues to myself. Now sure I've come to a lot of you for advice over the years, but I always knew I was holding something back. Vital information that could have been helpful in giving proper advice. For someone as outgoing as I am, you would think it would be easy to do something like that. One of the biggest complaints I've had against me as a boyfriend is that I don't really open up. And for that, I'm sorry. I don't know if I really know how to open up correctly. I spent my life being the one there for everyone else, that I forgot to take notice of those that were always there for me. But for whatever reason, I can open up on here, express my deepest fears and issues on here, but can't say them verbally. Does that make any bit of sense? No, it does not. But that's how it is I guess.

So then what is on my mind? You know, I don't really know. All I know is that life has yet to turn out the way I was hoping it would. Does that mean life sucks right now? Eh, maybe. But I know it could always be worse. So yeah, it sucks that I had to move back home to Missouri and live with my parents, but at least I have parents that allowed me to do so. I have a warm bed, a hot shower and a roof over my head. Is that really a bad thing? No, my family is pretty cool, so it's been ok. It just sucks that I'm a college graduate who is unemployed still. But I've got a family that loves me enough to support me through these tough times. I've got a car that is in excellent condition, I never doubt if it will start when I go out to start it, and with the exception of a crazy headlight, it functions perfectly. And I get to park it in our garage and life is good. Could life be better? Of course it could, I think life could always be better.

I apologize to those friends back in Memphis and in Mississippi that I've lost touch with. I miss you guys, and I'm trying to get back in the south. I loved my time there, well most of it anyway. haha. But I couldn't have asked for better roommates all throughout college. The best part is, I didn't have to keep changing them every year. We all got along, we were friends, and we have memories I'll never forget. This past year in Oxford was some of the best times of life. Staying up way late and ignoring homework to dominate in another game of Phase10 or lose ridiculously in a game of Yahtzee or any other game for that matter. Going to the basketball games and baseball games all semester long. The coining of such phrases as "WWJD, What Would Josh Do? and then do the opposite." or Jim's favorite quote of mine (that I never really said, mind you) "I can't, I have a receding hair line." Getting conned into going to a Lil' Wayne concert, driving out to Dallas and spending money I didn't have just to go to the Cotton Bowl, catching a home run ball at a Redbirds game. I couldn't have asked for better friends this past year, you guys have been absolutely amazing. I feel like I owe you more than I could ever give you. You guys rock, the end.

So what am I up to now? Well, other then living at home, not a whole heck of a lot at all. I'm looking for a job, pretty much anything at this point. They've already given me two callings a church, I'm the YSA rep for my ward (go figure right, I can't shake it. ha) and I also work with the Bears for Cub Scouts. And it's been way fun. We're working on a skit for the Pack Meeting in a few weeks. As far as the job search goes, I've got a few leads down on the coast. My dad has a lot of connections down there, and so we're gonna see what we can find. I've heard back from places like Dallas, and San Antonio as far as working at federal offices out there. I made the second to last cut in San Antonio, but missed the final cut. Dallas, no dice. And so it's been a big letdown on the job front. But I get to be home and spend time with my family, and that's always a good thing, right? I've been able to watch my little brother play soccer for the high school. Good times.

I guess that's it for now. But whats a blog of mine without some music? So I'll talk about the new Pearl Jam album for a bit now. It's actually really good! I'm a big fan of Pearl Jam, but their last few albums I've liked some of the songs, but typically not the whole album. But the new one "Backspacer" I love from front to back. Especially "Just Breathe" and "Amongst the Waves." The line from "Just Breathe" I love the most says "I'm a lucky man to count on both hands the ones I love/Some folks just have one/others they got none." And I realize how truly lucky I am. I do have quite a few people that I love. And you guys are awesome. And then "amongst the waves" just has that great rock song feel to it. One of those songs you just know that when they play it live it's gonna be unbelievable! I love Pearl Jam. And other albums I've been listening to a lot lately are the "High Fidelity" soundtrack and the "Adventureland" soundtrack. Both great movies with equally as great soundtracks. Ok kids, I think that's it for now. Enjoy!

Stadium Attire Etiquette

Ok, so no deep thoughts here, no 'woe is me, why is my life not working out' notes. Just a simple comment on what to wear and what not to wear to sports games.

First of all... for those who don't know, as soon as I got back into Missouri (and yeah, I moved home, ugh) I got a job up at Kaufman Stadium where the Royals play. And while I've worked every home game since I've been home, I've noticed a few things that REALLY bother me.

First of all... Cardinals fans... I have nothing against the Cardinals, and you know, I'll root for them too on occasion. But you know what... you're at a ROYALS game... leave that stupid Cardinals jersey/t-shirt/t-shirt jersey at home!!! (exception, when the Royals are PLAYING the Cardinals)

This is what I don't understand... why would you wear a shirt that supports a team that isn't even playing in the game that day? That makes no sense whatsoever! If you're a Twins fan... wear that shirt when the Royals play the Twins. You like retarded otherwise.

Now, some of you are saying this goes against my concert attire theory, and I say at first glance, you're right. But it's a different situation here. At a concert, it's about the music and spreading word about other bands that people may like while they are at this concert of the person/band they already like. But at a baseball game... it's a contest between two teams. You're either for one team, or the other... not some third team that isn't even present.

Example from my own life, a few weeks ago, I traveled down to New Orleans to go to the BYU-Tulane football game, among other reasons. Am I big BYU fan? No way! Am I a Tulane fan? Nope. But did I wear my Ole Miss stuff to the game? NO! Cause that would be stupid! No one cares if I'm an Ole Miss fan at this game... Ole Miss isn't playing in it!

Exception to the rules is if it is a shirt of a team of a different sport. For example, wearing a Chiefs jersey to a Royals game, totally acceptable, even though you SHOULD have picked out a Royals jersey as well.

ugh, ok, I'm done. I just had to get that out, I've wanted to make fun of sooooo many people this past month because of this issue, and now I feel better! Thank you!

I uh... I dunno...

So... I pulled this up because I figured I was going to have something to say. And I can't really think of anything. Life is mostly pretty good right now. The economy has struck my family pretty well, but we're making it. We're swimming above water... but barely, like many families out there. Life is not where I thought it would be at this point in my life, I figured I'd be a bit farther along with things, but still nothing. And sometimes I wonder what's really in store... but you know... you just gotta keep swimming. Already halfway through september, kinda weird to not be in school anymore, but I'm glad I'm done. I dunno. This didn't really help, so I'm just gonna end it now...

Congratulations! But now what?

Well... I did it, I graduated college. Nothing too fancy, just a 2.8. Got myself a bachelors degree in Criminal Justice with a focus in Homeland Security. You would think that in a world where we're busy fighting terrorism every day, you'd think that I'd be able to get that job... Apparently that 2.8 isn't very impressive. I'm fluent in a foreign language, and that's still not good enough. Up until now, in my life, I've always been good enough. And now, well, now I'm not. I've lived my whole life in a world where I could get by by just doing enough. I got a lot done that way, avoided quite a bit of problems. And I got things done my way. And getting things done my way has worked for 24 years. And now my way doesn't work anymore. I wasn't prepared for that. I knew that it would take awhile for me to find a job... but you know, I graduated almost 4 months ago and up until two weeks ago, I was still working at a minimum wage job. Now, instead of working at that minimum wage job, I'm unemployed and living with my brothers in Georgia on an air mattress. This is how life is supposed to work out, right? Yeah... exactly right. It's meant to be hard... right? If it wasn't hard, it would be easy. Well, for the last 24 years, life has been easy. And now it's not. So congratulations on graduating college, but now what? Move on with life, get a job, become a part of the world where problems matter. As a student, my parents took care of me, they helped me with all of my needs. They helped pay rent, and now, I don't even have an apartment to call my own. I'm living out of two suitcases and in a few short days will be taking off to a new location, sad thing is, I don't even know where that will be. Is this the life of a college graduate? I thought it was graduate and join the real world, and get that 8-5 job where you get stuck in rush hour and complain about the drive. But instead, all I'm doing is bumming off my brother and now I can't even stand to do that anymore. Where are the jobs I was promised, where are the interviews that I was always able to get before? Why has life brought me to this... up at 4:15 in the morning for the 14th day in a row... Life... It really sucks. Spent my life just doing enough to get by, and now, I don't even know what enough is. I can't figure out what this life wants of me. And it bothers the crap out of me.

Welcome to my blog

Well, this will be my blog. It will contain my views, attitudes, complaints, emotions and anything else that just happens to be on my mind. I call it My Depth Perception because this is what I see it is. This will be life the way I see it, through my eyes. Sometimes you may agree, sometimes you may not. More than likely you won't always agree. And that's ok. I don't always expect you to read this either... In fact I'll be surprised if that many people read it anyway. So, I think I'm gonna wrap it up and leave it here. I figure if you're reading this, you already know me and a lot about me, otherwise we wouldn't be friends. Enjoy!